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<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Funny Facebook Status 
</p>
<p>Brighten the whole day of your friends by posting the most hilarious and funny facebook status 
</p>
<p>and tagging them in it. Share a new facebook funny greetings every day and brighten the day of 
</p>
<p>your friends and loved ones through this social network.
</p>
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 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Funny Messages - Very Funny Quotes - Funniest Greetings &amp; Wishes
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Todays Relationships: You can touch each other but not each other&#8216;s phones.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I am sure I have a defective iphone, I keep pressing the home button and I&#8216;m still at work.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Marriage is just a fancy word for adopting an overgrown male child who can not be handled by 
</p>
<p>his parents anymore.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The most powerful words other than I LOVE YOU is &#8213;Salary is Credited&#8214; :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Is there anything more awkward than when you are singing along to a song on youtube and the 
</p>
<p>music stops loading.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Years of education, solving tough problems, handling complex issues, yet we take a while 
</p>
<p>standing before glass doors thinking whether to Push or Pull.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Flirtationship: More than a friendship and less than a relationship.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Running away does not help you with your problems, unless you are fat.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>In bed, it&#8216;s 6AM you close your eyes for 5 minutes, it&#8216;s 7:45. At school it&#8216;s 1:30, close your eyes 
for 5 minutes, it&#8216;s 1:31
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I wonder what happens when doctor&#8216;s wife eats an apple a day. :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>GOOGLE must be a woman because it knows everything.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I only need 3 things in life: Food, Wifi, Sleep :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Boys, if you don&#8216;t look like calvin klein models, don&#8216;t expect us to look like victoria secrets 
angels. (From All Bachelor Girls Association) :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression he just cleaned the 
</p>
<p>whole house.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>When a woman says WHAT? Its not because she didn&#8216;t hear you. She&#8216;s giving you a chance to 
change what you said.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The human brain is amazing. It functions 24 hours a day from the time we were born, and only 
</p>
<p>stops when we take exam or are in love.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>My bed is always extra comfortable when I need to get out of it in the morning.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>One day your prince will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost and is too stubborn to ask 
</p>
<p>for directions :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If time does not wait for you, don&#8216;t worry. Just remove the battery from the clock and enjoy life.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If school has taught us anything, it&#8216;s texting without looking :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I hate people who steal my ideas, before I think of them :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Try to say the letter M without your lips touching.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Excuse me &#8230;. Plesae empty your pockets &#8230;. I think you stole my heart.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Silence is the best answer of all questions and Smile is the best reaction in all situations. 
</p>
<p>Unfortunately both never help in VIVA &amp; INTERVIEW.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I used to like my neighbours, until they put a password on their Wi-Fi :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I love my six pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Newton&#8216;s law of love: Love can neither be created nor be destroyed. Only it can transfer from 
one girlfriend to another with some loss of money.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Nothing moves faster than a girl untagging herself from an ugly picture :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The first five days after the weekend are always the toughest.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I look at people sometimes and think &#8230;.. Really?? That&#8216;s the sperm that won :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Girls are funny creatures. They hate it when you ask their age but will kill you if you forget their 
</p>
<p>birthday.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>How do people write an auto biography? I can barley remember what I had for lunch yesterday :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Nothing is illegal until you get caught :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Admit it, you listen to other strangers conversations and mentally give your opinion.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Dear Google, thank you for doing most of my homework for me. :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Girls work on their looks but not their minds b&#8216;coz they know boys are stupid, not blind.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The definition of a beautiful girl is one who loves me :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I hate when people all of a sudden decide to be funny when I am drinking something :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Only fools fall in love and I guess I&#8216;m one of them :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>God made everything that has life, rest everything is made in China :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Friday is my second favorite F word.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>For all the girls that say &#8230;.. All guys are the same &#8230;&#8230; Who told you to try them ALL.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Every girl deserves ONE GUY who looks at her every day like it&#8216;s the first time he saw her. And 
Im that ONE GUY :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I think I got a fever, a fever of you :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I always give 100% at work: 13% Monday, 22% Tuesday, 26% Wednesday, 35% Thursday, 4% 
</p>
<p>Friday :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Please GOD if you can&#8216;t make me slim, make my friends fat.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>For you men who think a woman&#8216;s place is in the kitchen, remember thats where the knives are 
kept. :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I hate when I am about to hug someone really sexy and my face hits the mirror.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If a single teacher can&#8216;t teach all the subjects then how could you expect a single student to learn 
all subjects.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Its better to fail than to cheat but its better to cheat than to repeat.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Most emotional moment in a boys life, When a girl says, Can you give me your number :D
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Dear Google, Please stop behaving like a GIRL. Will u please allow me to complete the whole 
</p>
<p>sentence before you start guessing &amp; suggesting.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Definition of human being: a creature that cuts trees, makes paper &amp; write &#8213;SAVE TREES&#8214; on 
the same paper.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Thanks to Google, Wikipedia, and whoever the hell invented copy and paste. Thank you Guys.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I don&#8216;t believe that love comes to those who wait. Today love comes to those who flirt. LOLz
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Dear Food, Either stop being so delicious or stop making me fat :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>It&#8216;s funny how people judge other&#8216;s mistakes while they also do the same thing.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I always learn from mistakes of others, who took my advice :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The question I have not been able to answer is &#8213;What&#8230; does a woman want?&#8214;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Boys will be boys as long as there are no girls in the picture.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If you love something, let it go. If it comes back, it was meant to be. If it does not, hunt it down 
</p>
<p>&amp; kill it.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Dear MATH, stop asking to find your X, she&#8216;s not coming back.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>You actually have friends? Yeah bro, all 10 seasons on DVD.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Marriage is like going to a restaurant and order your choice from the menu, And then look at 
</p>
<p>neighbouring table n wish you&#8214;d ordered that.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Quit your job, buy a ticket, get a train, fall in love and never return.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>My name is I. My problem is love. My solution is you.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If you wish to avoid seeing a fool, you must break your mirror :D
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The only difference between me and a madman is that I&#8216;m not mad.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Caution, Blind Man Driving.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Milk does the body good but DAMN how much did you drink?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If life gives you questions, Google gives you answers.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Boys think of girls like books; if the cover doesn&#8216;t catch their eyes, they won&#8216;t even bother to 
read what&#8216;s inside.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I feel like a Indiana Jones, because you are the treasure I am looking for.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Money can&#8216;t buy happiness, but it pays for internet, which is pretty much the same thing.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I hate when I&#8216;m about to hug someone really sexy and then my face hits the mirror.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I speak two languages, Body and English.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>How can i miss something i never had?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>BRB = I don&#8216;t want to talk to you. LOL = I have nothing else to say. Cool = I don&#8216;t care.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If life gives you lemons, just add vodka.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I&#8216;d like to thank the internet, Google, Wikipedia, Microsoft Word, and Copy &amp; Paste :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I think my iPhone is broken. I pressed the home button and i&#8216;m still at school.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Kiss me and you will see how important I am.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If you can&#8216;t find the key to success, pick the lock.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Forget love, I&#8216;d rather fall in chocolate.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Everything I like is either Illegal, Immoral, Fattening, Addictive, Expensive, or Impossible.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I know that somewhere in the Universe exists my perfect soulmate &#8230; but looking for her is 
much more difficult than just staying at home and ordering another pizza.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Teacher: Who can explain gender discrimination with an example? Student: Women can sleep 
</p>
<p>with whoever they want ,men have to sleep with whoever lets them!
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Do you know the meaning og ABCDEF? A boy can do everything for Girl. Reverse the meaning 
</p>
<p>of, GFEDCBA &#8230; Girl forget everything done &amp; Catches new boy Again.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Never make the same mistake twice, There are so many new ones, Try a different one each day.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>There are alot of fish in the sea, but I think there&#8216;s a hole in my net :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Want to learn how to dance? Have a cold shower today at midnight, I bet, You&#8216;ll rock like 
SHAKIRA :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you 
</p>
<p>will have a flat tire.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Married men should forget their mistakes. There is no need for two people, to remember the 
</p>
<p>same thing.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If money grew on trees &#8211; girls wouldn&#8216;t mind dating monkeys.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I&#8216;m not weird, I&#8216;m a limited edition.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if doctor is cute, forget the fruit.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Why is abbreviation such a long word?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Do you know what&#8216;d look good on you? Me :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>When I&#8216;m on my death bed, I want my final words to be &#8213;I left one million dollars in the&#8230;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>FACEBOOK STORY: Add as friend &#8211; Approve -&gt; Write something on wall -Intro &#8211; Everyday 
chatting &#8211; Ask number phone &#8211; Messaging &#8211; Calling &#8211; Meeting &#8211; Express love &#8211; Make 
relationship status &#8211; Hangout &#8211; Misunderstanding &#8211; Fight &#8211; Break up &#8211; Unfriend &#8211; Block :( THE 
END
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Do you realize that in about 40 years, we&#8216;ll have thousands of old ladies running around with 
tattoos?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Love is 1 drink and 2 straws. Marriage is &#8213;Don&#8216;t you think you&#8216;ve had enough!&#8214;.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Opportunity knocks for every man, but you have to give a woman a ring.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Im a math teacher. One plus two equals me and you
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Excuse me is your last name Gillette? &#8230;because you are the best a man can get!
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>When I was born I was so surprised I didn&#8216;t talk for a year and a half.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The secret to success is knowing who to blame for your failures.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>You look like a cool glass of refreshing water, and I am the thirstiest man in the world.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The police are on the way to arrest you for stealing my heart, hijacking my feelings, and driving 
</p>
<p>me crazy.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually 
</p>
<p>another woman.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Do you have the time? &#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230; O No, the time to write down my number? :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I believe we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried &#8211; but they wanted cash.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see 
</p>
<p>better than he can think.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Hi, Im Mr Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>While waiting for the right person, have fun with the wrong one.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Lovely days in my life : Childhood Days, School Days &amp; collage Days, Horrible days in my life 
</p>
<p>: ONLY EXAM DAYS :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Girls fall in love with what they hear. Boys fall in love with what they see. That&#8216;s why girls wear 
make up and boys lie.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>My girlfriend asked if I would swim across the ocean for her, and I said It&#8216;s freaking, I&#8216;ll rent a 
boat&#8230;..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If couples who are in love are called LOVE BIRDS, then couples who always argue should be 
</p>
<p>called ANGRY BIRDS
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Most mothers feed their babies with little spoons and forks. What do Chinese mothers use? 
</p>
<p>Toothpicks?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I have a Date tonight, Woot Woot! (of course its with the couch, pillow and TV Remote, but its 
</p>
<p>still a date. Right?)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>It&#8216;s Christmas and 2011 is coming closer to an end! what&#8216;s the funniest thing you remember me 
doing this year??
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Sorry, I can&#8216;t hangout. My uncle&#8216;s cousin&#8216;s sister in law&#8216;s best friend&#8216;s insurance agent&#8216;s 
roommate&#8216;s pet goldfish died. Maybe next time..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>C.L.A.S.S &#8211; Come Late And Start Sleeping
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Young love is two hearts with only one thing in mind.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>A man typed in search box on Google : &#8213;What do women want?&#8214;. Google Replied : &#8213;We are also 
searching&#8230;&#8214;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I&#8216;ll be a billionaire once I&#8216;m done inventing this device that lets you punch people in the face 
over the Internet.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If you stop telling lies about me, I&#8216;ll stop telling the truth about you.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The hardest job facing kids today is to learn good manners without seeing any.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Okay mom&#8230;you know I love you&#8230;but I can&#8216;t accept your friend request on Facebook.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I wish I could google &#8213;things to eat in my fridge&#8214; so I wouldnt have to go downstairs and be 
disappointed.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Remember, when she cancels a date she has to But when he cancels a date he has TWO.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>A man asks a trainer in the gym: I want 2 impress that beautiful girl , which machine can I use? 
</p>
<p>Trainer replies: Use the ATM
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Facebook is the only place where it&#8216;s acceptable to write on a wall.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Harush says if you want to be together you have TO-GET-HER.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I&#8216;m a smart person, I just do stupid things.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Thinks I feel great when I go to bed drunk. I wake up feeling crap. Obviously sleep is bad for 
</p>
<p>you.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I don&#8216;t get it, all my life I was told NOT to write on walls.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Behave, What you do today will be on Facebook tomorrow.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Some relationships are like tom and Jerry, they irritate each other, they tease each other, but they 
</p>
<p>still can&#8216;t live without each other..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Growing older is compulsory Growing up, however, remains optional.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The best way to look younger, hang out with older people.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I&#8216;m usually charming, nice, and well manured, OK for those who really know me you can laugh 
now..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If you like me press like. If you hate me, go away. If you love me comment.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Don&#8216;t you hate when the person you&#8216;re Facebook talking never updates anything.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Women only need 3.5 inches to achieve maximum pleasure, it&#8216;s called a credit card.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I need 6months vacation, twice a year..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I am going to start cleaning my house. And by cleaning, i mean drinking beer and spraying 
</p>
<p>everything with febreze.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>That awkward moment when you keep talking &amp; you don`t realize your friend walked away.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Never make the same mistake twice, there are so many new ones, try a different one each day.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Some people are such treasures that you really just wanna bury them.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I am not feeling lazy actually, I am just incredibly motivated to do nothing..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>You and your rumors have two things in common, you&#8216;re both fake and you both get around.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If life give you lemons, squirt your enemy&#8216;s eye..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Well, We have a poke button, now we need a punch and pinch and kick button..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Facebook is a crazy house People poke each other all day have an imaginary pet farm and talk to 
</p>
<p>walls
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I don&#8216;t have issues, I have demonds and they are the ones with issues
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I&#8216;m the person that the more you complain about me, the harder I&#8216;ll try to annoy you.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Sometimes the only one who can appreciate you, is you.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I&#8216;m not getting older, I&#8216;m just becoming a classic..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I&#8216;m not 40, I&#8216;m eighteen with 22 years experience&#8230;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I may be old enough to know better, but I am STILL young enough to DO IT..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If you are reading this, congrats you know how to read..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>When you&#8216;re good, you&#8216;re good, when you&#8216;re awesome you&#8216;re me..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Thinks if Peter Piper picked peppers and Jack and Jill ran up the hill and Mary took her lamb to 
</p>
<p>school, wasn&#8216;t Humpty Dumpty lazy just sitting on a wall?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The zoo is a pretty safe place to fart.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I bet that in prison everyone&#8216;s FB relationship status is set to it&#8216;s complicated.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about 
</p>
<p>their motives.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Facebook is like a fridge. When you&#8216;re bored you keep opening and closing it every few minutes 
to see if there&#8216;s anything good in it.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>When we are bored we get on Facebook, then we get bored on Facebook so we get off then 15 
</p>
<p>min later back on. its an endless cycle..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>My life, My choices, My mistakes, My lessons, Not your business.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>There are no stupid questions, just stupid people..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>That awkward moment when somebody is doing dishes and you slowly put another dish in the 
</p>
<p>sink.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Doctors finally figured out what&#8216;s wrong with a boys brain; on the left side, there&#8216;s nothing right; 
and on the right side, there&#8216;s nothing left&#8230;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Never make the same mistake twice, There are so many new ones, Try a different one each day.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Don&#8216;t steal, don&#8216;t lie, don&#8216;t cheat, don&#8216;t sell drugs. The government hates competition..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Tip to reduce weight, first turn your head to the left and then turn it to the right. Repeat this 
</p>
<p>exercise every time you are offered something to eat.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Your eye is the only part you can not wash with soap.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>One day, I&#8216;m gonna make the onions cry..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If Facebook is the Upper West Side and MySpace is the Bronx, then Tagged is a trailer park in 
</p>
<p>New Jersey.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>You can not get lost on a straight road.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>When I was born I was so surprised, I didnt talk for a year and a half..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about 
</p>
<p>their motives.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Facebook is the only place where it&#8216;s acceptable to talk to a wall.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Life is too short, smile while you still have teeth..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Do you know the difference between a lady and a woman? A lady does what she&#8216;s told and a 
woman does what she dam well pleases!
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I like kids, but I don&#8216;t think I could eat a whole one.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Where there is a will, there are 100 relatives.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Doing the moonwalk is the only way to look cool while wiping dog crap off your shoes.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Before talking; Please connect the tongue to the brain!
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If swimming is an exerciser explain whales to me.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I`m jealous of my parents, i`ll never have a kid as cool as theirs&#8230;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Before talking, Please connect the tongue to the brain&#8230;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If swimming is an exerciser explain whales to me.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Can I take your picture?? I love to collect pictures of natural disasters..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I have finally figured out why I can&#8216;t lose this extra weight. The shampoo I use in the shower 
that runs down my body says, &#8213;for extra volume and body.&#8214;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Even if you live your life as a open book, people will still wonder which pages have secret 
</p>
<p>messages.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>For every girl without a guy, there`s a guy without a girl.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Some people like my advice so much that they frame it upon the wall instead of using it.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I follow the quote, &#8213;Always be true to yourself&#8214; because I only lie to others!
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>You`re beautiful until your Photoshop 30 day trial has gone.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The awkward moment when you know you shouldn`t laugh, but you do..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I am a star, so when you see me, make a wish.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I posted on your wall. No, not Facebook, look at the side of your house.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>That awkward moment, when you wake up with one sock on.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Money doesn`t bring happiness, but shopping does..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I`m not single. I`m in a long standing relationship with fun and freedom.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Don`t you know it`s rude to talk while I`m interrupting?  
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Girls And Boys FB Status 
</p>
<p>Tired of searching girls and boys status on internet? Now don&#8216;t search on other sites we have 
wide range of girls quotes here.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

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